Train(ing) of Thought
"Wow, that's a lot," my doctor was ear to ear with a huge grin.
Last week, having noticed my curious leg pain, I got worried about my ankle. It sometimes gets a little locked up, and if I walk for long distances- painful. I made an appointment with my favorite wonder surgeon in the upper east side. Better safe than sorry.
I went on to explain my mileage, how often I run based on my team. It really isn't that mu-
He cut me off.
"Trust me, I see a lot of people. That's a lot of running."
It takes a year to fully recover from this surgery, he reminded me. I was doing great- amazing- better than most "Top 5%!". The surgery was a big success- he was extremely impressed!
And just like that, I watched my thoughts bubble up, like an out-of-body experience:
But it wasn't that much. I should be running harder.
My friends are much stronger.
I am so much slower than I used to be.
I'm overweight.
I should be doing more.
Trying harder.
Right then, I realized that I have been telling myself a story. A negative narrative, that may have started as a crutch, or a series of self deprecating jokes, but now has become a habit.
This story, it may be true, but I don't need to hear it. I want to grow and be better, but I don't need to criticize my current state to get there.
The fact is, the only thing that can thwart my training more than my leg, is my mind.
Lacing up my shoes this week, I'll try to weave a new story. About how strong my ankle is, how proud I am of myself for all the work I've done, and leave that old tired tale in the dust.
PHILLY MARATHON TRAINING + "CASUAL ATHLETE SYNDROME" UPDATE
The race is two months away! Ahh!!! Our training plans have us running 4-5 times a week, which I've been pretty good at since we got back from our honeymoon. I never thought I could run this frequently without injury so I am stoked!
If you've been following along, you know that last week I spoke about "Casual Athlete Syndrome" and vowed to take my training a bit more seriously. While I've been unable to reform my diet, I have been hydrating and rolling every night- so that's a win!
This upcoming week will be more of the same- with added focus on that pesky diet part and making negative thought patterns a thing of the past! Time to start training my thoughts- wish me luck!